Why??

WHY in the world am I doing this?

Over the past few weeks I have answered many questions about my mission. But one important one I still need to answer is why am I doing this? Why would I move from a developed, wealthy nation, to the poorest developing country in the world? Why would I give up my job, to go do something I have never done before? Why would I leave the comforts of my house to live in a new place? Why would I choose to miss out on watching the kids in my life that I care about so much grow for a full year? One of my best friends and her husband are having a baby girl right before I leave and I would be lying if I told you that I will not be a bit heartbroken to miss the entire first year of her life! Why would I leave my family, my friends and my church family for a year?

All of these questions, plus many more have gone through my head at some point as I was deciding, and even now, as I prepare for my year in Malawi. Even though there are all these reasons I could use as an excuse not to go, there is one simple explanation as to why I will be going, and it’s really pretty simple. I feel CALLED back to Malawi.

Before we left for Malawi as a family in 2004, our friends and family all gathered together for a commissioning service. During that service the moment that stands out in my memory the most was when we sang the hymn “Here I Am Lord”. This has always been one of my favorite songs to sing (and I know whenever it is being sung I can look at my mom and she will most likely be crying). The Lyrics to this song can easily answer the question, why am I doing this, they read:

“Here I am Lord. Is it I Lord?

I have heard you calling in the night.

I will go Lord, if you lead me.

I will hold your people in my heart.”

I’m going to Malawi, with the help and support of all of you. I have heard God’s call in my life, and I’m ready and willing to follow that calling and go where the Lord is leading me… to Malawi!